Is there opportunity in challenge?
Wednesday, December 17th, 2008I don’t think HIV stigma, or any other stigma for that matter is something that you can oppose in order to stop. To me it’s like waging a war to end a war, it can often be self-defeating. However I believe that HIV-stigma and related oppressions like racism, sexism, and homophobia can be worked through, in open discussion. It has me think of SuperMario Brothers. In the old game, there were these ghost characters that only came to life if your character didn’t face them head on. Stigma for me, operates the same way. Just speaking about it, facing it head on, begins to stop it in it’s tracks. That’s one of the most productive components of this site, these discussions. From time to time however, discussions can be silenced. Not always intentionally, but none the less, eventually. I get how that can happen. HIV is such a personal and emotional topic in the gay community. We all have a relationship to it whether HIV-negative or HIV-positive, it triggers so much in each one of us. Even as a facilitator I have found myself challenged by some of the things being said on the site from both community members, and at times even from other facilitators. That’s okay though. Challenge is more than okay, if we approach it in ways that while not necessarily having us all agree, at least have us better understand one another. That all being said, I guess my question then is this; Is understanding always possible as it relates to HIV and HIV-stigma given this difference in the lived experience of HIV-positive and negative men? Are there too many layered walls between us (defensiveness, resentment, blame etc.) , for HIV-negative guys and HIV-positive guys to completely understand where each other is coming from?



