Stigma: mark of shame or discredit
Stigma: mark of shame or discredit: stain c: an identifying mark or characteristic; specifically: a specific diagnostic sign of disease
Above is the Webster definition of stigma. When I think of it, I think of it as a weapon that continues to destroy and divide us. By us I mean everyone because everyone is affected by HIV and AIDS on this planet. Many of us have identifying marks or characteristics that make us who we are or perceive to be. From my dark curly hair, honey brown skin, tattoos, teenage boy stubble and location an astute observer may be able to guess that I am a child of immigrants, queer, or even maybe Trans. All of those guesses may be right and some may even cause me to be discriminated against but not anyway close to the prejudice faced by people living with HIV/AIDS all over the world.
Stigma, along with other forms of discrimination: homophobia, racism and misogyny continue to be the biggest barrier to world wide public action about HIV/AIDS.
My interest in this campaign stems from the need to confront the misconceptions, misinformation that is still out there around HIV/AIDS. I also want to challenge folks to look at their own behaviours and attitudes. I want folks to feel that they can engage and challenge each other. We need to communicate and discuss all kinds of issues.
For instance, I feel there should be a “normalization” of HIV testing? I also think the key to confronting stigma is to confront homophobia.
What are your thoughts on this?
octobre 28, 2008 13:33
I appreciate all the comments and insights and everyone getting the ball rolling on this discussion. I agree with Rodger when he states that there should be shared responsibility around making sex as mutually safe as possible. I want to make it clear too that in no way was I suggesting that being trans and having HIV are the same. There are similarities in the issues around disclosure and the ignorance faced from the mainstream gay men’s community around both things.
octobre 28, 2008 13:06
Thanks Bob,
for the encouragement.
octobre 28, 2008 12:29
is disclosing the same thing as not telling the truth about one’s status when asked?
octobre 26, 2008 14:57
Of course, it’s very different- I was just referring to the commonalities in terms of disclosure & the reality that it’s really hard to disclose something that is so stigmatized (be it serostatus, trans status, or both).
But, I would challenge the notion that someone is being put in harm’s way just by having sex with someone who doesn’t disclose their HIV status- it depends on whether or not you’re practicing safer sex- and the point is that because stigma makes it hard for guys to disclose (and 30% of poz guys don’t know it) you shouldn’t be relying on disclosure to keep yourself safe anyways…
octobre 26, 2008 08:56
I get what you guy’s are saying about personal information but being trans and having HIV aren’t equivalent when it comes to having sex, at least unsafe sex. A guy can not tell me he’s trans and we can have sex and there’s not harm to me. But, if he has HIV and we have sex, at least unsafe sex, there can be a real harm. Isn’t that a difference?
octobre 25, 2008 16:17
I absolutely get Anonymous’s point about disclosure if he had a phalloplasty. Your personal history and any related physical and medical issues are 100 percent your own business.
I don’t have the right to know anyone is trans unless they choose to share that with me. And it really is similar with HIV.
Disclosure is power, sometimes an increase in power and often it can be a loss in power. No one has the right to demand that of anyone.
octobre 24, 2008 15:05
I want to applaud both those who speak on this site, are featured in the various media forms this campaign includes and those behind the scene. I’m sure countless hours went into organizing this and continue to be put in now that this message has hit the street. Thank you so very much to each and every single one of you.
I really like the attention focusing both on disclosure and stigma. Too many people are really good at stigmatizing when and how disclosure occured (or didn’t). I wish those people would devote that energy to getting testing, discussing the frequency at which they did and the location where they for it with a greater number of people. If you can’t discuss the last time you got tested, why shouldn’t I assume you’re positive? If you didn’t get tested, the timing of my disclosure shouldn’t be your concern.
octobre 24, 2008 14:18
I totally agree with you, Kyle.
While obviously when it comes to HIV there are the particular fears that many neg guys have around contracting HIV, becoming ’sick’, etc., it does seem like many non-trans gay guys are actually afraid of sleeping with us (speaking as an HIV-negative gay trans man). It’s like instead of being afraid of their health becoming ‘dirty’ (hence wanting to sleep with ‘clean’ guys), they’re afraid of their gay identity being impure. As if once they find out that the cute bear they were hot for has different genitals, they suddenly lose all their gay cred.
Honestly, if I had a phalloplasty (so that I could ‘pass’ as male once the underwear came off), I probably would never disclose my trans history to casual sex partners- so I really get why HIV+ guys might not disclose.
Thanks Nik for getting this conversation started with your insightful comments- looking forward to seeing where it goes!
octobre 24, 2008 14:14
I appreciate the solidarity from Kyle and Nic. Knowing some trans folk as friends has helped me see connections between what they go through and what we poz guys experience. And of course there is overlap between both groups, since there are poz trans gay guys.
octobre 23, 2008 15:42
Brian, when you said that disclosure isn’t something “owed” to someone when going out for dinner, I chuckled because this is exactly my feeling around being trans. This is something we share as gay men. In fact - in a strange way - it was a poz friend of mine who helped me to see that his battle with the stigma of HIV was extremely similar to mine with being a trans man. Obviously there are differences, but the general issues are the same. Having something about our bodies that is stigmatized, something that is seen as a shameful secret by some, something that people feel they deserve the right to know right away, something that makes them NOT choose us as potential dates or sex partners. Something that sometimes makes them look at us like we’re diseased. While I do identify as a gay man, it’s been a challenge for me as an openly trans man, and it actually helped me to realize that my particular journey as a gay man isn’t so different from many other men I know.
octobre 22, 2008 20:15
Hey Nik,
I’m an Australian working in positive health and I was referred to this site by a friend. It’s great to see some real-life interventions designed to tackle stigma! I’m just writing to query your use of a dictionary definition of stigma, which actually locates the problem as a mark or attribute in the person who is the *victim* of stigma. A better definition based on social research would identify stigma as a social process based in how people respond to a particular attribute. Otherwise you end up blaming the victim, in a way. There’s a really great resource on this issue from America: http://hab.hrsa.gov/publications/stigma/stigma_defined.htm and there has been some great writing by authors like Gregory Herek, Link & Phelan, Parker & Aggleton.
Good luck with your campaign,
Daniel
octobre 19, 2008 14:18
Thanks for a thoughtful post. I think poz guys are not obliged to disclose and that all sexually active people share the responsibility around making sex as mutually safe as possible. I think being stealth around HIV is completely acceptable. I don’t think that guys who disclose are better people or more responsible than people who help protect others by playing safe and help protect themselves (and often their careers and personal reputations and their own sexual health) by not disclosing their status.
octobre 19, 2008 09:16
I so get what you are saying. One of the reasons why I’m so uncomfortable not just being myself and open. Because if I’m not, then I really don’t know what they are like. Disclosure is the timeless question from the beginning of the days we starting dealing with this.
Everyone has their own approach. I can understand why someone would say nothing and get to know someone, say go on a few dates, and then feel like they might want to say something. This is not information that is “owed” to someone when going out for dinner the very first time. Perhaps someone wants to be seen and gotten to be known as a person first, and then introduce status into the equation.
Guys don’t realize that the worse they act about it, the more it pushes positive guys who a whole host of reasons, insecurity, the need for love and affection, lack of self-esteem, internalized homophobia + HIV stigma, or simply lack the skills to deal with these situations, underground. Underground means not disclosing. It’s basic behavioral science, if something or someone receives a negative consequence to a particular behaviour .e.e disclosing, their going to stop and go for the positive (no pun intended) option instead.
And for those who get all indignant, and it matters that much to them, then I suggest, they really get to know someone before having sex. Go on dates, not the bathhouse, spend time with him, get the test if you really need to and show each other the results, but don’t go out having causal sex with a sense of entitlement that people are going to disclose their status. It’s just not going to happen.
I could write a book on this subject alone, which is why I plaster my status all over the place and then the jerks and phobes can self-select out so I don’t have to deal with their baggage, I already have enough of my own.
octobre 16, 2008 21:47
Good job! I really like the way you think - and express yourself. Well done you!